Eternal Love, Is It For Real?

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It kinda funny how love works so fast. 

Such like love at first sight. Has it come to you, peeps? 

Hmm, well, for me myself, yes it has. No no no, I mean, it doesn’t work. I thought it's a love at first, but at the end, I realized, it was not. I only admired him, but I didn’t love him at all. So, what they called love at first sight, is totally wrong for me. It is not love, it is passion. 

But at this moment, I’m not gonna tell you about that, I’m gonna tell you about how love could lasting forever—or at least, for very long time. Unremitting. But hey fellas, one you should know is, it rarely happens. Only one in a thousand....

But for sure, guys, a gentleman in my life, have that kind of love.

And ridiculously, that eternal love is meant for me. 

For the sake of tartar sauce! What is so special about Putri Erdisa Januarti? Whose name is not even recognized by the president, whose name is not even recognized by the headmaster in her school! What is so special about me?

And, oh my gosh, please do forgive my mistake… I ignored his love. 

I don’t know what happened to me, but I don’t have any feeling with him! I can't, even if I tried to. It seems like we’re made to be friends, not to be a lovemate or whatever. It is weird how a person, who loves me sincerely, can’t get my own love in return! It seems like… love is unfair. Very unfair.

Ah, I don’t know. I feel so guilty right now. It hurts, fellas, it really hurts to hurt a close friend; he is a real chum of mine! Okay you might ask me like this,

“So why, Putri, if you feel guilty on him, why don’t you just accept him as your boyfriend? You should be having a special feeling with him even if it’s so tiny!”

Well, the answer for the question is: I don’t have any special feeling on him. Not even a tiny one. So, if I did accept him, but in fact I have no feeling on him, it would be so much more unfair for him, right? Settle down with a person who just pretending to love the mate, is absolutely a misery! 

Oh sucks! I hate being into such situation like this! I mean, do I have any choice? No. The only choice is “no”.

But it really, really hurts to ignore a person who loves me eternally. Endlessly.

(fyi, he has loving me about 2 years!! Cool, uh?)

But then, at the end, I don’t know what I should do now. Maybe it’s proper if I just let him still for awhile. I don’t know. I totally am a newbie for these stuffs. 

So, is there any suggestion, chums? I really need it.

This post is dedicated to the gentleman who has give me that eternal love, R,

you know ka? i will never forget you,